I’ve seen that look before – the eyes fixed on something distant, yet seeing nothing at all. Sweat beads dripping off the brow, but more telling than the physical strain is the quiet sense of defeat. Poor Roger. He’s just standing there, not giving up, but clearly lost.

Just a week ago, he was my star student, beaming with confidence and bravado. He believed there was nothing he couldn’t do. Other students looked up to him – he led warm-up exercises, volunteered for demonstrations, and showed off his skills, impressing everyone in class. He thrived in that role. So what changed? Quite simply, Roger got promoted.

For some, earning a promotion can feel like a setback rather than an achievement. They become comfortable excelling at a certain level, but the moment they are faced with greater challenges, they falter. The security of being at the top disappears, and the demands of the next level can feel overwhelming. It’s the classic case of the athlete who peaked in high school, forever looking back at past accomplishments rather than forward to future growth.

I’ve seen students quit right after earning their promotion – whether to the intermediate class or the advanced ranks. Not because they lacked skill, but because their mindset couldn’t handle the challenge. The ego struggles with going from the best in the class to the newest, from mastery to uncertainty.

But that’s just life. High school athletes experience it when they transition to a college team, and college athletes face it when they’re drafted into the pros. Growth means stepping into unfamiliar territory, facing new challenges, and embracing the struggle.

Roger, however, will not become a statistic. He may feel lost now, but by pushing through the discomfort – by overcoming the insecurity of not knowing, the higher physical demands, and the self-doubt – he will emerge stronger and more confident.

I tell my students they are like rubber bands; to be useful, they must be stretched. It’s uncomfortable, but that’s the nature of growth. And when they come out on the other side of the challenge, they won’t just be better martial artists – they’ll be better versions of themselves.

Roger will find his footing again, I have no doubt, he’s that kind of kid; and when he does, he’ll realize that every challenge was simply a stepping stone to something greater.